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Have you ever done something where the outcome is unknown to you?

A while ago a co-worker took me skydiving for the first time. After agreeing to go I remember lying awake in bed that night full of anxiety about the event. It wasn't scheduled to take place for another week but there I was, already contemplating my guaranteed demise. I remember thinking to myself, "Why are you doing this to yourself?" "Skydiving is safe, it's fun, it's something you've always wanted to do, so why are you already assuming you are going to die?" Eventually I got tired enough and drifted off to sleep.

The day of the skydive I felt a twinge of nerves on the ride up, but otherwise was calm. During the orientation my calmness only increased, and by the time we were getting onto the plane I was basically in a state of Buddha like meditation. As soon as we were a couple of thousand feet off the ground a feeling of total euphoric immersion gripped me and I could think of nothing else but the present moment. All fear had passed.

From the moment I dropped out of the plane with my instructor and free fell several thousand feet, through the opening of my parachute, to the final seconds as my feet touched down onto the sandy landing zone I did not feel a moments worth of fear or uncertainty. Only after, when the realization of what I had just lived through finally hit me, did I feel the smallest bit of nerves.

Why am I telling you this?

Simple. The key to everything, and I mean everything that you want from life resides in your ability to overcome your fears.

"How do you go about eliminating fear?" you ask.

The first thing you need to understand about fear is that it is two things at once. It is both a learned and instinctive emotion. It is against our natural instincts as human beings to jump out of an airplane. It is against our biological instincts to seek out change when our current situation is "good enough." But we also learn fear. Every time we convince ourselves that we cannot do something, cannot succeed in some way, we are putting control of our lives in the hands of our fears.

But we have a secret weapon when it comes to dealing with fear. This is: Our present reality does not condemn us to a future of the same! We can change, adapt and learn new ways of thinking and acting. Because of this incredible gift it is unnecessary for anyone to live in fear. It takes an incredible amount of work to achieve the change that frees us, but like Steve Pavlina loves to say "...the time is going to pass anyway..."

When you begin the process of working to overcome your fears you are going to meet with tremendous resistance. This may be internal or external in nature but the effect will be the same. The resistance will try to get you to stop the changes that you have enacted in your life. It is of paramount importance that you understand why this is happening. This is taking place because the part of you or the external force that is rebelling against this change will cease to exist when you overcome it! Think about this for a second. Try to remember the last time you overcame a fear in your life. The moment it stops being an issue for you it ceases to exist. I would fight pretty hard too if I knew that a change would result in my total destruction.

As individuals we tend to dislike change...tend to rebel against it and run from it. But until we accept that we have to change we will always be prisoners of our current circumstances. The fear we feel about losing our jobs, the anxiety that fills us as we enter a room filled with strangers, or the thoughts of failure that plague us whenever we think of pursuing our dreams, these are all just symptoms of a greater fear. This is the age old fear of the unknown. In order to overcome it we need to develop the courage to jump.

Most people throughout their lives have been conditioned to re-act to life...to accept their present circumstances, to be fearful of the unknown, and to seek out stability in the form of consistency. In order to move past our fears we need to re-condition ourselves to a new way of thinking, acting, and living.

"How do I do this?" You ask. "How do I re-condition myself after a lifetime of obedience to fear and re-active living?"

My answer is..."Every Journey must begin with a single step." The powerful changes that you have to make in your life can seem overwhelming when viewed as a whole. Like crossing the Sahara dessert it doesn't seem like a possible task to accomplish when viewed in one glance. But the secret is in the doing. Conquering fear is like anything else in life. Practice makes perfect. The first time you tell yourself that your fear is irrational, you will not even notice the thought. The tenth time will probably be the same. By the hundredth time, though, you will have repeated the process enough so that your conscious mind will begin to notice. This is where it starts.

You must condition yourself to work through and ultimately let go of your fear. Just like the athlete conditions himself to work through the pain in order to achieve his goal so you too must condition yourself to overcome your fears through purposeful thoughts and actions until you get the results you are looking for.

Remember what I said about our present reality not condemning us to a future of the same. This is only true if we make a change, and creating the courage to change is a conscious act. It's not something anyone is born with. It must be acquired. The courage to jump is a skill that anyone can come by.